My Summary of 2009

The last year (2009) has been hectic and to some extent baffling, so far... life is being garrulous... throwing away realizations at me, at a break neck speed.. one after the other...such effusiveness!! It scares me some times...

so many emotions....Frustration, pain, angst, fear, glee, exuberance and all that is part of growing older... wiser and cynical...

Meeting new interesting people... losing old friends... the ones you thought were there forever... learning to live without love... feeling less... talking more.... getting insecure about the future... hitting an all time financial low then growing strong again... and most of all becoming more independent. The realization, that sometimes even your friends won't be there for yo when you need the.... learning to live without people you think you cant live without... working harder... making compromises... living for yourself and listening to others....

So many things to do... so little time....

One thing I'm yet to learn...learn to stop loving....

Dreams or Nightmares

She looked over her shoulder,
He was reduced to a fading shadow in the dark night.
She wished to stop him but her tears chocked her voice.
He felt relieved, he was free.
Free from commitment.
Something died in her, as life struggled to survive in her womb.

A Long Wait

I've trusted many a friend that failed,
And left me to weep alone...

I've dreamed many dreams that never came true,
They seem to vanish at dawn...

I've drunk from the cup of disappointment and pain,
I've gone many days without song...

They don't understand
They never did
They never will...

Miracles Happen??

They say Miracles Happen
They happen to those who Believe

I believed I was loved,
I wasn't

I believed I had a true friend,
I didn't

I believed they would care,
They didn't

I believed my heart won't break,
It did

I believed they wouldn't use me,
They did

I believed all was not lost,
It seems it is

I believed they would accept me,
They didn't

I believed...
Now it's as if I don't believe in Believing

But somewhere deep within
I still believe in You

I still Believe in Me..

Somewhere deep within
a child, a lover, a friend, a daughter, a woman
is waiting for a
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Miracle to Happen :)

Silly lies that keep us going

A gift from my cosmic mother

J Mom...I call her my Cosmic Mother...so full of emotions.I won't write much about her coz I don't have the right words that can even begin to explain this wonderful woman... And a beautiful writer..

This is what she recently wrote for me to pep me up :P so I couldn't help but share it with all of you ....

Attitude, attitude, that’s all that matters.
Attitude Don’t bow, eat crow, screw gratitude
Smile, give, be so- nice? No latitude.
Speak your mind. No, its not rude
Its all about the attitude.

Be like me. Be free, free free.
A butterfly and a bumblebee
Soar like an eagle, scrape the skies
Wear no masks. Who needs disguise

Do what you want, its your life.
Are you a ninny playing a fife?
I’m old, not grey. I’m feisty and fey
I smoke and I drink, I think-think –think

Beauty is brains, have a beautiful mind
You’ll leave the bimbettes way behind
Be clever forever, juggle your words
Hunt with the wolves, fly with the birds
Enjoy, bring joy, you’ll never grow old
Listen to me. Do what you’re told.


Thanks J Mom :) Love you lots...

I scared the cops with RockeTalk!!

So I always thought RockeTalk is a social networking application and you all know how I keep going on and on and on about it being free, and fun and how’s there’s so much to do. But at the end of the day a lot of people still thought it was a waste of time, or meant for those who actually had spare time to connect with strangers…and since they were all too busy with their boring jobs, hence they did not have time for it. But I just discovered a good use of RockeTalk! I used it to actually scare the cops and get my car back from them, which they were not ready to return earlier.

It so happened that my poor driver got stabbed on sat night or Sunday morning…(whatever you wanna call that) right outside our house by the famous Delhi goons (you find them everywhere, esp in winters at night). Seems all they wanted was some quick money, lil did they know that the guy who they are stabbing for money had only 200 bucks in his pocket and his cell phone in hand. Yet the poor kid got stabbed twice in the stomach and twice in the back…uuggghhhh... :(

So obviously we rushed him to the hospital to keep him alive…and all the time blood trickled down his clothes like you would have left a tap open someplc…it was the most horrifying thing I had ever seen in my life! No bollywood movie, horror books, mafia games had prepared me for what I was seeing in front of me :( …anyway, the guy in question is ofcrs safe now but when he was hospitalized , we had to follow the regular procedures. The much dreaded FIR had to be logged etc etc. Somehow every time the cops get involved in something, they end up creating a useless mess of it. In this case, the duffers thought of keeping my car under their custody (for evidence) coz it had my driver’s blood all over the back seat. I had a hard time explaining that my car was not involved in any manner, and the only reason it had blood all over the back seat was because I had pushed the guy on the back seat while I drove him to the hospital, but freaking idiots didn’t wanna listen and looked at me as if I was the one trying to cover up something! So fine, go…take the damn car! They did say I shall have it back before I woke up the next day so….

And 4 days went by with me going to the Police Station everyday 3 times to get it back. Excuses, excuses and more excuses to keep my car under custody without having a appropriate reason or any paper work. Just the fact that they were cops (huh!!) was enough for them, BUT not for me. So I kept ranting and then finally spoke to this cutie in my office who loves getting into trouble and out of it too. And he gave me this super idea that actually worked.

This morning I went to the station, (the cops had gotten used to seeing me walk in now, no one bother to look up as to what I want), I went straight to the SHO (yeah finally the jerk was sitting at the right place) and DEMANDED my car back! He looked at me with those have-you-lost-it eyes and then I sat down calmly and had a word with him:

Me: Do you know what I do for a living?

SHO: (Rolling his eyes, thinking oh gr8, she’s gonna throw attitude now) No madam , but I do remember we have met b4, ur uncle told me you work or a mobile company.

Me: Not a mobile company, it’s a mobile application. It’s the easiest way of staying in touch with your friends and making new ones all over the world.You shoot and send videos too you no!!

SHO: (completely clueless where this was getting)

Me: Let me show you. (I gave him a rundown of RockeTalk)

SHO: (After 5min)…nice (he still had the I’m-lost-u-crazy-woman look on his face)

Me: Let me give you a demo (I pointed the camera at his face and strtd recording)

Me: Hey wait, I came here for my car (camera still rolling), forget all this. You guys don’t have a reason to keep my car. It was not involved in the accident. There’s no official paper work signed that says you have the right to keep my car wid you. And I want it back now. If you don’t give my car back I will drag this issue to the papers!

SHO: (Smirking) Bada garam khoon hai? thanda karo. Meri office mein aap mujhe ko dara rahey ho. Aap ke uncle ki wajha se chup hun, warna darwaza dikha deta!

Me: (wanting to kick him in the balls, but keeping my cool) Sir, thanda to aap ka pura station ho jayega jab yeh video, jo ab tak ban raha hai, who mein ek networking application pe post karungi aur world over aap famous hongey. Not just that, it will automatically get posted to You Tube, and ofcrs, Indiatimes walo ke liye aachi gossip hogi.

So now if you have a legal reason to keep the car, say so, if not, I’d like to have the keys back, now, I’m getting late for work you see (giving him a nice smile, didn’t wanna push him wid the attitude bit, freaking bastards can’t be trusted)

SHO: (after thinking for complete 3 min…walks up to the constable) ye black Wagon R ki chabi kahan hai?

Constable hands out the keys and drops it into my extended hand.

Me: (turning to the SHO) Thank u so much. In case you need any help regarding the case we shall help out. Not that there is much to say. Bye

SHO: Nahi madam, aap log ka to koi lena dena he nahi is se. Aap mat pareshan ho. Hum dekh lenge.

And I happily walked out with my car keys, came back home. Gave it to the neighbor’s driver and told him where the car was parked. By the time this blog is gonna go up, I believe my car would have gone off to the workshop for clean-up and a change of the upholstery!! No more blood stains!!

Since 4 days I was going crazy running from pillar o post to get my car, and all I had to do was threaten the cops by taking a video and tell them that it gets posted on a social networking application and they behave! Wow…thank you RockeTalk :) Love you even more!!

PS: The cutie from office who gave me this dramatic idea, is the same person who sometime back called me a drama queen!! Well, I guess the drama pays off at times, huh?